A Twist Of Noir 122 - Franky Newhart

BULLETS MAKE BITCHES WEAK - FRANKY NEWHART

Stacy was his ex-girlfriend that always seemed to be talking to herself. Their relationship was one of issues. Stacy wanted someone that was faithful and committed, while Jeffrey wanted someone that believed in him. Everything seemed to be going so well. Fun and games. Long conversations on the phone.

Then they just moved on to fucking each other.

Suddenly, Stacy was needy. She didn't trust Jeffrey with anyone or anything.

“I'm going to hang out with my friend Veronica.”

“Well, then give her a good fuck for me.”

“Wait, baby.”

“You know what, whatever.”

He eventually had to make up excuses to not hang out with his female acquaintances/friends. He did nothing for her not to trust him.

They would have fights that were always petty. Stacy would always start it with a remark like: “Who do you think your talking to? You're like a child; what you say is not even clever.”

Then Jeffrey would reply, “Guess that makes you a pedophile.”

Awkward pause.

“Because we have sex,” Jeffrey said, laughing at his own joke.

Jeffrey lived for Stacy. He never even thought of being with another girl. When he brought this up to Stacy, she replied with, “I don't think you have the balls to cheat on me.”

Exactly what did he do to deserve this?

“It was almost as if the act of sex between us broke your trust,” Jeffrey later responded to Stacy, in an open letter for a poetry reading that she did not attend.

In an ironic plot twist, she broke up with him. After, Jeffrey found out that Stacy was cheating on him with some guy that she met on the internet. They would still make time for each other and be off and on but no matter how many times Jeffrey hit CTRL + ALT + DELETE on the relationship, Stacy was still just a dirty whore that broke his heart.

“Too bad whores aren't bulletproof!” screamed Jeffrey to his gun.

BIO: Franky Newhart realizes that this story might not even qualify genre-wise but figures it's worth a try.